who,who,who, who are you

Who are you?
Who, who, who, who?
Who are you?
Who, who, who, who?
Who are you?
Who, who, who, who?
Who are you?
Who, who, who, who?, (“Who are you”, by The Who)

In the mid sixties to mid seventies, Woody Allen made a whole lot of movies primarily about neurotic Jewish men. His protagonist was seemingly the Jewish Everyman and among the many frailties of the character he also was physically a nebbish of a man (slight and uncomfortable in his skin). On television during those same years many to most Jews were never the leading man but mainly someone’s friend who was studious, ugly, an accountant, doctor and a miser with money. During those years Jews in the media were portrayed as characters, stereotypical characters based on the lack of self respect by fellow Jewish writers and the lack of conscience by anyone else.

If you were a Jew in the movies or television show you never got the pretty girl, you lusted after the pretty Non Jewish female, or the one pretty Jewish girl was lifted on a horse by some well built successful Non Jewish man of her dreams, not her nebbish Jewish compatriot.

I grew up in a very Jewish neighborhood so I knew all of this fantasy was not reality. I had many Jewish friends who fit none of the stereotypes the media dreamed up in hopes to make money. I knew the truth but felt so frustrated when some Non-Jewish friends would ask are they all like Woody Allen, or suggest that somehow we owned the banks, lent money at high interest, or wonder what it was like to get the left over’s when it came to women?

Well, who are you? (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Oh, who are you(Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Oh Tell me, who are you? (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?) (“Who are you”, by The Who)

During the past few years Gays have become quite popular in the media, there is even a cable station supposedly dedicated to the life and times of the LGBT community. We have reality shows showcasing angry Gay men all dressed up in tight jeans that have hissy fits and cat fights with their buddies. We have Gay men who love to play dress up. We have gay men as drag queens and we have Gay men who make the girls from the movie “Mean Girls” look tame. How nice to show America the life and times of Gay men.

I am a Gay man and none of my friends do any of the above mentioned activities. Some of my friends are a little flamboyant, some of my friends are boring as hell, some of my friends have no idea what shirt matches which pants, and some of my friends are more worried about meeting their monthly debt obligations then throw the next big party.

I know a variety of people who among many positive things in their life happen to be Gay. I know a variety of people who have never been nor do they want to be a one dimensional character shallow and selfish. I have met some Non Gay people who ask me if most men only care about their looks, wear dresses, act like bitches or are so self centered that it is only what is good for them that counts.

I woke up in a Soho doorway
A policeman knew my name
He said "You can go sleep at home tonight
If you can get up and walk away"

I staggered back to the underground
And the breeze blew back my hair
I remember throwin' punches around
And preachin' from my chair

Well, who are you? (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
I really wanna know (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Tell me, who are you? (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
'Cause I really wanna know (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?) (“Who are you”, by The Who)

I have grown tired of explaining I am not what you see on the screen. I am tired of saying some of us may be like that and many of us have our own quirks, charms, indiscretions, and unique traits. I have grown tired of only being represented in the media, whether it is as a Jew or a Gay man as a cartoon character. I have grown tired of the same useless jokes being repeated and repeated in order for those who are unaware, ignorant, fearful or empty to try and justify a demographic they just don’t understand, nor really seem to want to know.

Who am I? It is very complicated and it is very simple. Who am I? It is based on ALL of my experiences that have taken me to the ripe old age of 62, and it will be the new memories I make along the way to 63. Who am I? Not the common denominator the writers, producers, actors love have portrayed on the screen. Who am I? I am just like you. Who are you, who, who, who, who?