So, against my better interests and fighting my urge to vomit, I tuned into the show featuring the half Governor, name on a best selling book written by someone else, abstinence doesn't work mother if you don't tell your daughter what happens if she is not abstaining, comedienne, tweeter extraordinaire, and watched.
I watched for a full hour, looking and listening, and when it was over I was a bit miffed, I could not tell which zombie was Sarah Palin. I could find First Dude Todd, he was the zombie eating a dead deer, but for the life of me I could not find Sister Sarah. Then Joe said honey you are watching the 'Walking Dead', this is AMC not Discovery. Yikes, and I thought it was a good show, scary, bloody, brutal, mean spirited all the aspects that surround Sarah, certainly I thought, this had to be it. But it was the wrong zombie and the wrong zombie show. Damn!
Then I thought, since Discovery Channel is so concerned about pretending the life they show is real, not checking facts, promoting someone who isolates rather than find consensus, I would write them and suggest some more quality programs which fit the same mold as 'Sarah Palin's Alaska'.
How about George W. Bush's, 'New Orleans'. We could start the series with the ex-President floating high above the clouds waving to the people drowning. We could pan in on his momma Barbara Bush sitting in one of the box seats of the newly refurbished Dome and retelling her story about how those black people should be happier that they are in the Dome compared to their own homes in their flooded neighborhood. We could then watch as "Good Job Brownie", reminisces about not calling in the guard, not permitting aid until day three or four, and not even sweating in the humid heat of New Orleans. And the series could end with the author George Bush sitting next to Oprah on her over sized yellow chair, lamenting that if only he had done it differently, of course never apologizing for what he did, but stating that perhaps that he would have done all of it without any audio or video. Never one for prints on the smoking gun.
And why stop there, I said to myself. One more show, 'Dickie Cheney's Iraq'. Fitting name because I am sure when he started the war the Vice President was sure he and his Oil CEO's were going to own that Muslim loving oil rich country. After all he had his boys at Blackwater and Halliburton hired as mercenaries watching the rigs, and calling the necessary shots. Mr. Cheney planted the lies for WMD's never told the stupid Congress about how much the contracts to fight the war would cost (never mind the stupid and unpatriotic Congress never asked), and he had his henchmen ready to decapitate anyone in Iraq who might question America's role in Iraq. And to cover all bases (that Vice President never missed a beat) had his henchmen in the guise of Scooter Libby ready to reveal a CIA agent because her husband questioned the ethics of the White House.
Tricky Dicky could stand in front of his hidden cave in Wyoming, with his Uzi in hand (he can't use a rifle anymore), and proclaim how building that one true democracy on the lives of over 4000 troops and 100's of thousands Iraqi's was the right thing to do so he and the share holders of the oil cartels could get wealthy and wealthier. The last of the series could show Cheney's private militia blindfolding the journalists and writers and threatening them that if they ever disclose his hiding place scenes like those at Abu Ghraib would happen to them.
'Sarah Palin's Alaska', 'George Bush's New Orleans', 'Dick Cheney's Iraq', now that is honest, sincere, television you can trust. I am sure there are those advertisers who care less about morals and values and just love to entice the loser lemmings to watch good for nothing TV. I know some of the advertisers who paid for Sister Sarah to brag about her Alaska are waiting with baited breath to make the already infamous Georgie Bush and Trickie Dickie Cheney into real stars...reality stars.
And who knows maybe Newtie Gingrich will do a show about monogamy in marriage, and Mike Huckabee will talk about how dinosaurs are only a Stephen Spielberg creation (those darn Jews), and John McCain will talk about equality in the armed forces.
On second thought I will just tune into the zombies.
1 comment :
Or maybe we can have one about Sen. David Vitter espousing family values and the joys of marriage, while his mistresses are all lining up to witness how he does think of his wife and children while spending taxpayer money on the little sexcapades Vitter likes to experience.
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