I had decided that being a Gay man in Pittsburgh, when I finally admitted, to myself (in the ’80s) a truth I must have always known but refused to let out of its triple-locked cell and moved to Houston; left me feeling shameful and uncomfortable in my hometown. I had my young children, was still their dad, but internally I still felt ashamed, and back in the day, guilty, thinking maybe this homosexuality thing was not natural. As I grew into my OWN reality, I realized it was nature, and as with any of the varied cognitive, intuitive, intellectual or artistic positive traits, my sexuality, WAS all perfectly packed into that egg and sperm which met somewhere in January 1949, on a cold wintry day. Nine months later Gerry Buncher arrived, as common and unique a human, from those which whom I felt I had to hide. But I did feel the need to do the guilty dad routine and spoil my kids a best I might!
The above is a prelude to a short scene, a true and as I still reflect back in time, a frightening happenstance, all taking place in Disney World Orlando. I hate roller coasters, my kids did not, so reluctantly I agreed to try Splash Mountain. Back in the day before Speed Passes, we waited in line. It was hot, hot and humid and the line long enough that my two kids and I were stuck in the no shade section of the winding Disney style lines. Of course, I tried everything in the world to be the best dad, never really listening to my kids, who ALWAYS then and now, told me and tell me they loved and love me.
My daughter looked hot and seemed sweaty, I was worried! There was an Italian Ice huckster two feet away, the line had not been moving for at least 10 minutes…what to do… I turned to my son always a law abider and a protector and instructed him to hold his sisters hand no matter what and I would be back in a few seconds. Tough choice for me, but I felt my daughter was too dehydrated and my son could use some liquid also. My son was not too certain about me leaving them, but I assured him (even though I was scared, it would so fast no one would know I was gone. I found the Italian Iceman, in what I thought was a few seconds, and within that time the line moved. I turned and suddenly sickened I saw no kids. I started screaming their names like a mad man, my heart in my gut, my gut ready to fall out of the body and my head throbbing. I was certain someone kidnapped my kids. And then this very tall man who was standing in front of us heard me waved his hands and was standing with my kids. I got a lecture from my son, but he also informed me he thought it best to move along with the line, my daughter was scared, but the Italian Ice changed her demeanor, and I held my kid's hands, kissed them both…I was so relieved, that even though Splash Mountain was a roller coaster, I could have given one shit…I had my kids!
Lots of points to this story, lot of discussion moment and moments of reflection, but that one time when I thought I had lost my children sent such horrible emotional chills up and down my entire body…I HAVE to think about how the PARENTS of kids ripped from their arms, PARENTS collected like garbage bag by ICE as their kids are left behind, and PARENTS having to attend funerals because #Moscow Mitch, the GOP and now Trump refuses any kind of gun control laws. I do not understand how the DEMS have not been fighting harder and harder to get Congress back to work, and how ANY American Parent has not been so outraged witnessing these inhumane actions by an insane man named Trump!
